The LAPD, the FBI, and the CIA are all trying to prove that they are the
best at apprehending criminals. The President decides to give them all a
test. He releases a rabbit into a forest and has each of them try and
catch it.

The CIA goes in. They place animal informants throughout the forest. They question all plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investigations they conclude that the rabbit does not exsist.

The FBI now goes in. After two weeks with no leads they burn the forest,
killing everything in it including the rabbit, and they make no apologies.
The rabbit had it coming.

Then the LAPD goes in. They come out two hours later with a badly beaten racoon. The racoon is yelling, "Okay, Okay!!! Im a rabbit, Im a rabbit!"